FC: Congress acts swiftly -- to protect animal privacy! (satire)

[Declan McCullagh <declan () well com>]

[There is no Rep. Harold Wolfe -- Democrat, Californian or other -- in the 
U.S. House. Aside from that, it's an entertaining satire. Previous Politech 
message: http://www.politechbot.com/p-03497.html --Declan]

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From: "japgray" <japgray () msn com>
To: "Declan McCullagh" <declan () well com>
Subject: Congress Acts to Protect Animal Privacy
Date: Sun, 12 May 2002 08:03:43 -0400


                     Congress Acts to Protect Animal Privacy

By Peter Gray
Washingtonword

Washington, May 13, 2002 Reacting to concerns that animals in captivity do 
not have a legal right to privacy, Rep. Harold Wolfe (D-CA) today 
introduced the Animal Privacy Entitlement (APE) Act of 2002. The 
legislation would provide animals in zoos, circuses and theme parks with 
new privacy protections.

In a statement, Congressman Wolfe said, Over 50 bills have been introduced 
in the 107th Congress to protect human privacy, but none to protect animal 
privacy. This is unfair, undemocratic, and discriminatory. My bill would 
extend to animals basic fair information practices that limit the 
collection, disclosure and uses of health and other personal data on 
animals. I expect many animal lovers and privacy advocates in Congress will 
co-sponsor my bill.

Among the most controversial provisions of the APE Act, video surveillance 
of the dating, mating and other personal activities of captive animals 
would be prohibited. The Act also allows class-action lawsuits to be 
brought on behalf of captive animals against zoos and other public animal 
habitats that violate, or permit the public to violate, animal privacy.

Animal rights activists, privacy advocates, and trial lawyers joined forces 
to support the legislation. Speaking on behalf of the group, Polly Finch, 
Executive Director of The Center for Animal Democracy, said that the bill 
represents an important step forward to ensure privacy parity for animals. 
Since  an animal is not capable of  bringing a private right of action 
against an abuser of its privacy, legal representatives of animals should 
be permitted to file class-actions on their behalf , she added.

On May 6, 2002, the Washington Post reported that the National Zoo refused 
to release a deceased giraffe s medical records on grounds that it would 
violate the animal s right to privacy. However, courts have ruled that 
animals do not have a legal right to privacy. The APE Act would remedy this 
legal deficiency.




Declan, your Politech subscribers will recognize that humor sometimes 
becomes reality. Peter  




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