IP: Do you finally feel old (or a lot older)?

[Dave Farber <farber () cis upenn edu>]

Date: Thu, 12 Nov 1998 14:12:17 -0800
To: farber () cis upenn edu (Dave Farber)
From: Jim Warren <jwarren () well com>

An item from a friend. Most frightening aspect: These folks will soon be
voting.

--jim; jwarren () well com
Jim Warren, sometime columnist, political irritant, hedonist wannabe

===

At 1:40 PM -0800 11/12/98, Kathy Christian wrote:

> As we enter another academic year, remember that the people starting
> college this fall across the nation were born in 1980.
>
> They have no meaningful recollection of the Reagan era, and did not know
> he
> had ever been shot.
>
> They were prepubescent when the Persian Gulf War was waged.
>
> Black Monday 1987 is as significant to them as the Great Depression.
>
> There has only been one Pope.
>
> They can only really remember one president.
>
> They were 11 when the Soviet Union broke apart, and do not remember the
> Cold War.
>
> They have never feared a nuclear war.
>
> "The Day After" is a pill to them, not a movie.
>
> CCCP is just a bunch of letters.
>
> They have only known one Germany.
>
> They are too young to remember the Space shuttle blowing up, and Tianneman
> Square means nothing to them.
>
> They do not know who Momar Qadafi is.
>
> Their lifetime has always included AIDS.
>
> They never had a Polio shot, and likely, do not know what it is.
>
> Bottle caps have not only always been screw off, but have always been
> plastic. Except on beer
>
> They have no idea what a pull top can looks like.
>
> Atari pre-dates them, as do vinyl albums. The expression "you sound like a
> broken record" means nothing to them. They have never owned a record
> player.
>
> They have likely never played Pac Man, and have never heard of Pong.
>
> Star Wars looks very fake and the special effects are pathetic.
>
> There have always been Red M&M's, and Blue ones are not new, Green ones
> may
> have special meaning.  What do you mean there used to be beige ones?
>
> They may have heard of an 8-track, but chances are they probably have
> never
> actually seen or heard one.
>
> The Compact Disc was introduced when they were 1 year old.
>
> As far as they know, stamps have always cost about 32 cents. Zip codes
> have
> always had a dash in them.
>
> They have always had an answering machine.
>
> Most have never seen a TV set with only 13 channels, nor have they seen
> ablack and white TV.
>
> They cannot fathom not having a remote control. They have always had
> cable.
>
> There have always been VCR's, but they have no idea what Beta is.
>
> They were born the year that Walkmen were introduced by Sony.
>
> Roller-skating has always meant _inline_ for them.
>
> They have never heard of King Cola, Burger Chef, The Globe Democrat, Pan
> AM
> or Ozark Airlines.
>
> The Tonight Show has always been with Jay Leno
>
> They have no idea when or why Jordache jeans were cool.
>
> Popcorn has always been cooked in a microwave.
>
> They have never seen and remember a pro sports teams like the St. Louis
> Cardinals, the Baltimore Colts, the Minnesota North Stars, the Kansas City
> Kings, the New Orleans Jazz, The Minnesota Lakers, The Atlanta Flames, or
> the Denver Rockies (NHL hockey, that is.)
>
> They do not consider the Colorado Rockies, the Florida Marlins, The
> Florida
> Panthers, The Ottawa Senators, the San Jose Sharks, or the Tampa Bay
> Lightning "expansion teams"
>
> They have never seen Larry Bird play, and isn't Kareem Abdul-Jabbar a
> Football player?
>
> They never took a swim in the ocean and thought about Jaws.
>
> The Vietnam War is as ancient history to them as WWI, WWII or even the
> Civil War.
>
> They have no idea that Americans were ever held hostage in Iran.
>
> They can't imagine what hard contact lenses are.
>
> They don't know who Mork was or where he was from.
>
> They never heard the phrases "Where's the beef?", "I'd Walk a mile for
> Camel", or "Boss, de plane, de plane!".
>
> They do not care who shot J.R. and have no idea who J.R. is.
>
> The Cosby Show, The Facts of Life, Silver Spoon, The Love Boat, Miami
> Vice,
> WKRP in Cincinnati, and Taxi are shows they have likely never seen.
>
> The Titanic was found? I thought we always knew where it was.
>
> Michael Jackson has always been white.
>
> They cannot remember the Cardinals ever winning a World Series, or even
> being in one.
>
> Kansas, Chicago, Boston, America, and Alabama are places, not bands.
>
> McDonalds food never came in Styrofoam containers.