Interesting People mailing list archives
Authenticating to the Georgia DMV
From: Dave Farber <dave () farber net>
Date: Wed, 21 Jan 2004 12:27:38 -0500
Delivered-To: dfarber+ () ux13 sp cs cmu edu Date: Wed, 21 Jan 2004 12:05:42 -0500 From: Rob Carlson <rob () vees net> Subject: Authenticating to the Georgia DMV To: Dave Farber <dave () farber net> For IP, the author gave me permission to forward this to the list with a link.http://tequilamockingbird.blogspot.com/ 2004_01_01_tequilamockingbird_archive.html#107469525200926236
1.21.2004 conversations with dmv employees by tequila mockingbird welcome to geico! in order to finish processing your request for a new auto policy, we need the following information: - your georgia drivers license number please contact us with this information so we can complete your request. huh. my georgia drivers license number. well. thats something. my georgia drivers license number. no idea what that could be. see, i dont have a georgia drivers license number anymore. mostly because i do not have a georgia drivers license anymore. i have a maryland drivers license. and, when you get your maryland drivers license, you have to surrender your old license. thats the term they use. surrender. i love it. it sounds so dramatic. like youre making some huge sacrifice. surrender! i surrender my license to you, oh lord baltimore. so, you can see how it might be impossible for me to give them my georgia drivers license number. thank you for calling geico, how may i help you? i received an email from you guys asking for my old drivers license number. from the state i used to live in. but, i dont have that license anymore is that something i can authorize them to release to you, or do you know what ill need to do? what state was it? georgia. ooohhh. yeah. they wont give that to us. Yeah, georgia wont release that information to us. youll have to contact the georgia dmv and get that from them. they wont release that to us. so, they wont release that to you? what? i couldnt resist. no. just give them a call. okay, thanks. now, there are few things in this world that i dread more than anything involving the words department of motor vehicles. maybe things involving the word colon or pierce. but its really too close to call. georgia department of motor vehicles. okay, right there notice the total absence of any phrase even remotely resembling may i help you? not even how may i direct your call. not even what the hell do you want? nothing. im a former georgia resident, and i surrendered [so dramatic!] my georgia license when i moved to maryland. im getting new insurance, and they need my georgia drivers license number. so, do you guys have that on record? uh huh. great! wonderful! okay, what will i need to do in order to get that information? i went to your web site but i didnt see an option to request my driving records online . you need to come in to the office and well just tell it to you. im pretty sure i mentioned that part where i moved to maryland. and, furthermore well just tell it to you doesnt sound very official. well, coming in to the office might be a bit tough for me im in maryland now. so [silence] so [silence] so uh is there another option for me to get that information? i can mail it to you. im not trying to be ugly here when i say that ive seen the lightning speed with which governmental agencies tend to operate. ive been a state government employee. its glacial. you can put sod on your ass and grow tulips faster than you can get something in the mail from the department of motor vehicles. how about faxing? can i fax the request to you and then get the information via fax? no. no? no. its not secure. we dont have any way of knowing where were faxing it to. im just not up for a fight. its the dmv. its like the borg in star trek: resistance is futile. okay, i guess well just do mail then. is there a form i can print off and fill out and send in? i dont need a form. just give me your address. so, i give her my mailing address, and wait. what am i waiting for? im waiting for her to ask me my social security number. or my date of birth. or even the address i lived at in georgia. something. anything. okay. ill send that out to you. wait. and im torn. do i ask questions that might antagonize the borg, thereby ensuring that i never receive my information? never. ever. ever. i dont want to make it angry, or give it the impression that im somehow opposed to assimilation, but im just sure that she must have forgotten something. i mean, how can she know which one of me i am? like, what if there is more than one person with my name she didnt even ask for my middle name. how can she be sure this is really me asking for the information? i cant stand it. excuse me, but im a little confused. confused? well, sort of, yes. i mean, i dont really understand how this is more secure than maybe faxing it to me. i mean, i just gave you an address it could be any address. i could give you a fax number, and it could be any fax number, so i guess i just dont understand why we cant i mean, i dont understand how this is better. or more secure. so, is that a fake address or something? that one you gave me. no, its not, i mean what i was trying to say was oh, forget it. thats what the voices in my head are screaming. just forget it. but the voice coming out of my mouth just keeps right on going. and, i guess i also dont understand how you can figure out who i am. or be sure i am really me. i mean, dont you need to know something that will help you find me in the system? i mean, all you have is my name just my first and last name. not even my middle name. [silence] thats a good point. okay how about you give me your georgia drivers license number and i could look you up that way. -- Rob Carlson rob () vees net http://vees.net/ ------------------------------------- You are subscribed as interesting-people () lists elistx com To manage your subscription, go to http://v2.listbox.com/member/?listname=ip Archives at: http://www.interesting-people.org/archives/interesting-people/
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- Authenticating to the Georgia DMV Dave Farber (Jan 21)